Sad Sour days

It started when he shift his school from Orlando to Los Angeles, LOL, its not because i don't like him being in a new location, but that i was so happy that he could finally found a place where he could actually learn something meaningful... he can now learn how to manage his homework, his time and personal activities, i am sure he is happy there...

Umm, i don't want to say something which seems to make me jealous , but then it was fine now, i don't think he will really make me jealous, love yaa love yaa .. hahahhaa ..

I know i shouldn't get myself into thinking of bad situations all the time, i tried to calm myself but telling myself he is the kindest person i had known up till now, no one had treated me better than him, i am so thankful to have you inside my life (LOL, today's thanksgiving too .. thank you for everything i got up till now, i should not be regret for everything i have been through, love you <3)

umm, another thing to say is this sad thing started last thursday, i felt something has changed between the two of us, i tried not to think, try not to worry, try to smile, try to make things feel better, but just that everything went wrong ! i hate that .... this feelings is really hurt, i felt things just went wrong ...

What makes me feel worst is that he said "time would make our memories gone" no!!! that should not happen, i was so sad, depressed and mind complicated... stuck in a situation where i don't know what to do... please do help me !!! my mind is like bursting, but thanks god this week homework is not as much as  the previous week, which will make me collapse if it were this week ....

Starting from friday last week, my tears had started to roll down my cheeks, but i hold it beneath me, not intending to let anyone see, i should always smile, a big happy smile so that others can be happy as well, i hate sad expression... but i don't know, i just can't get stop to think ... and this really makes me awake for many many days at night, my eyes were kinda swollen... hahaha, its no problem, i get used to it too :D

I can understand that being in a relationship, couples do break up not always because they are cruel, mean... some people may break up because they just play with girls, but some also for the sake of may be one of them, or some is because of how cruel time is ! time ! time ! time ! time can really change a lot of things, making it worst! they really do make our memories vanished .. but me , don't worry my darling, i will always remember you , bury you underneath the bottom of my heart ...

I will never regard you as a cruel person, i promise you .. i do think you are the only person who can understand my feelings clearly ... i hope faith will let us to be together ...

I will close my heart from now onwards, like i did before, i will not let anyone inside, as if you let anyone inside, it is very difficult to release the person <3 <3 <3